WRATH OF GOD or Why Has No One Subscribed to My Blog?

we played mafia last night. because i organized, we had a random assortment of folk including a person i just met at a restaurant (who shall henceforth be referred to as waiter joe), waiter joe's roommate, and prom date jack (who has skipped out on the last six or so proms). for those of you who have not played mafia with the mindells, it is an experience. we are crafty, loud and expressive, and in mafia, that can work for us. or against us. there actually is no real formula. anyway, it's fun and we've decided to play tri-weekly, so if you're interested, it's game on!

last night we instituted a new rule called wrath of god. the way we did it, the narrator would randomly choose a player out of a hat-like object. (it was actually the plastic top of something that looked like a piece from my food processor. mara assures me that my food processor had no involvement in wrath of god.) if someone tries to kill or kick the chosen person (of whom the narrator alone has knowledge) out of town, then the person who led the charges dies when the chosen one goes.

being jewish, i like the idea of wrath of god. it's kinda like the book of job, where god and the devil make a bet over this stand up guy, job. because god loves job so much, god kills off job's entire family, takes away his wealth, his material possessions, probably even his nice, attractive hairline. there is more to the story. something about faith and sticking to god even when god takes everything away (hell, wasn't god the one to give in the first place??), but whatever.

i could also relate the idea of being the chosen one to buffy. but i wouldn't do that....




hm, i don't really remember how this is relevant....

okay, well, let's try this.

while many of my "friends" have told me that they "read" my "blog," i've noticed that none of you are subscribers. this is upsetting. you may not know this, but i'm very hip, and my blog is culturally topical. if you aren't a subscriber, you will miss out on all the cool water cooler talks...


man: hey, did you get that piercing you were talking about?
woman: i TOTALLY subscribe to erin's blog. she is SO cool and also a pivotal part of pop-culture. i recommend everyone be as awesome as me and subscribe as well.
man: you know, that didn't really answer my question.

so as you can see, you should subscribe to my blog to make friends with a blonde woman and/or some guy in a suit.

also, if you don't subscribe, the wrath of god will smite you.