What's My Name or Erin Squared

so, i currently have a house guest. this is not anything unusual, as i often have a house guest (not to be confused with the house boys of annie's blog posts...), but this particular house guest poses some problems. 

see, her name is erin. for those of you who haven't realized this yet, my name is ALSO erin (although, to be clear, i'm older [and wiser], so i was erin first), so when people ask what i'm doing, and i say i'm going home to hang out with erin, they think that i've turned into one of those people who talks about themselves in third person. then they look at me with a mixture of contempt and pity, slowly shake their heads and walk away. and erin doesn't like that*!

if i CAN manage to get through the awkward confusion of the fact that our names are the same, but that i'm not, in fact, talking about myself, then arises a second problem. people want to know how i know erin. so, i tell them, truthfully, that i know her from haiti. so they think she's haitian, which i'm pretty sure she's not:

not that there aren't whitey-magee haitians. i just know for a fact that erin is from colorado:

it's just i don't know her from there, i know her from haiti, so confusion abounds.  

unfortunately, our whole friendship has been peppered with such problems. there was a whole debate over who should be erin 1 and who should be erin 2 while we were in haiti. see, she was there first, so erin 1 would make sense, but since i'm older, i should really be erin 1. see how boring haiti is? we were forced to discuss these things at length.

but, i should get used to it. while she won't be on my couch forever, erin will be in new york to go to grad school with former first children:

so people are going to think that erin is speaking in third person all of the time when really she is going to hang out with erin. 

conclusion? to be honest, i don't even know what happened up there....

*erin 2, alias erin 1, alias, haiti erin, alias, girl on my couch could not be reached to verify her dislike of speaking in third person, but erin 1, alias erin 2, alias me, for sure doesn't like it. she wishes that she could've reached the formerly mentioned erin so as to make the joke work on multiple levels. alas, things didn't work out. now erin is sad. what?

Animal Farm or Here Kitty, Kitty Kitty

a lot of thoughts went (very rapidly- i AM add...) through my head as i was thinking about what write today. i mean, it's definitely time. you've gone too long without having to read (er, i mean GETTING to read) my deepest most inner thoughts.

so.

first i thought i'd tell you all the tragedy of how i'm dying. but i thought that would bring you too much joy:

then mara fowarded me an email that she wrote to kristen and helen eons ago, and it reminded me that i used to write funny emails, too. i was then going to dedicate a whole blog to reposting old emails that a lot of you already had to suffer through once. i mean, really, my mass emails were like a prelude to my blog. i decided agin it. (although if you missed them the first time around, i'm happy to send them your way.)

mara's email also reminded me of how funny SHE is, but then i couldn't printscreen the email to show you all, and i gave up on communicating that, as well.

and then, somehow, i got to thinking about the different animals i've been compared to in my life. thus i bring you:

ERIN'S BLOG ABOUT ANIMALS SHE'S BEEN COMPARED TO IN HER LIFE

my first animal comparison memory was being compared to cera from the land before time. interesting fact about this (interesting being the nicest word for no one really cares) is that while i was first compared to cera when the land before time (or tlbt as we hipsters like to call it) when the movie first came out. i was later compared to her when i went to college. specialady kt also saw the resemblance:

some might argue that cera doesn't count, considering she's

a. a cartoon

and

b. a dinosaur (as a kansan i don't believe in evolution and/or dinosaurs)

making her doubly fictitious. don't you worry, though, i have a whole long list of other animals

that i've been compared to:

cats (affectionate when i want to be, bitey when i don't):

dogs (although some just say bitch, but i'm sure they meant the loveable, fluffly kind of dog....):

chipmunks:

ferrets (for my desire, nay NEED to get into small spaces and break things. also the smell):

and just today i was compared to a koala:

a hedgehog:

and a unicorn (thanks, sean!):

what does this say about me? the same thing all of the colors mixed together says....BROWN.

Es-Cape or The Story of Ellie Moody

so, this past weekend i went to cape cod. for those of you who don't know, cape cod is attached to massachussetts. but, really, it's kinda its own thing:

look at me! i'm cape cod. i flex my arm muscle at the rest of the state of massachusetts. something about water, as well... and boats, we can't forget boats.

some good things about the cape include:

1. time with friends

2. finally seeing harleigh:

3. drag queens (the good ones):

4. chillaxation time

5. quirky t-shirts:

6. ellie moody (our awesome tram driver to the beach)

6. becky's mom!

some bad things about the cape include:

1. the traffic on the way

2. drag queens (the scary ones):

3. the people who sell quirky t-shirts (why yes i DID get into a fight with a woman trying to sell me a sweatshirt for more than was advertised on the sign above said sweatshirt. thank you for asking.)

4. almost dying on the way back.

some things that happened on the cape that were bad, but the cape can't rightly be blamed for:

1. everything about peggy sue got married. (how did i used to like this movie??)

but let's not dwell on the negative, as that wouldn't be like me. let's talk about the good. so, it was totally awesome to hang with debbie, becky, and harleigh. they hadn't met each other, which is weird because they obviously should've by now. so, we remedied that sitch.

also, watching becky and her legions of cats was really entertaining, if only because becky's head darts from side to side trying to follow the movements of all of them. it makes her look more spastic than normal (tough to do, i know). plus she refers to them as her siblings, which is amusing in an i'm-actually-kind-of-concerned way.

but the best thing about the cape was becky's mom! becky's mom summers at the cape, so we knew she'd be there when we went to visit. what i didn't realize is that becky's mom is a MOM. i mean, i should've put two and two together, but i'm an adult now (sorta), so i don't expect people to do things for me (unless you're one of my friends, read: minions. i DO expect you to do almost everything for me.) any more.

well, my friends, becky's mom! does it all. she provides beds and linens, gives advise on where to go and what to see, shares her lodgings, makes food(!) AND doesn't let you help clean up after yourself. she sneakily treats you to dinner, and she talks about how to improve becky's life with you while becky sits in the background making faces (stop pouting, becky!). all in all, i would definitely recommend her to a friend.

all of that AND i got to have nap time. hurrah! the system works.